Thursday, July 28, 2011
Ask Not for Whom the Wedding Bells Toll....
Don't ask about the freaking bells, because they might be wedding bells for your nanny.
I like to think of myself as a generous and kind-hearted person. Don't be fooled. I am really selfish and self-centered (as if you couldn't tell by this blog). Our dear nanny, Sabrina, is working out amazingly well. She's gregarious and has set up lots of neighborhood playdates for both kids and she's very loving and affectionate to the children. This is great, right?
Yes, it is great. What's not as fabulous for me is that she just told me she is getting engaged this weekend and married this fall. She's "waiting until October." "Of 2011?," I asked sheepishly. I love Sabrina and she's a wonderful person and I want her to be happy. I also want her to be my nanny. I promise I was happy for her, especially when she first told me. I actually thought it was great professionalism on both our parts that I didn't even know she had a boyfriend. The day after she told me about her engagement she told me she was going to need a favor. Feeling all flush from a smooth morning routine, I replied happily, "Sure, what is it?"
Basically, she needs to go to Algeria for 12 days in August to talk to her parents about her engagement.
Hmmm. Ok, not sure what my face was doing when she told me that, but I can assure you that the voice in my head was screaming, "do not panic. Do not panic." I didn't. She mentioned she had a friend who is a nanny looking for work who could take over all of her hours while she is gone. I am sure my kids will love that but I am still getting over Zenia and Teresa, so I am wary.
And, guess what? She's entitled to get married and be happy and have appointments and go tell her Lebanese father she is getting married. What kind of person do I really want to be? Someone who begrudges her a very happy time in her life? No way. I have had plenty of bosses like that and I am not available. And, let's face it, we are not running a nuclear lab here; we are taking care of children so there is no reason to go all "law firm" on her.
I had pretty much talked myself off the ledge after spending several hours worrying about upcoming inevitable absences for wedding dress fittings and cake tastings and honeymoons. I was ready to just take it as it comes and trust it will work out.
Then Jeff mentioned that she would probably get pregnant pretty soon.
Then, I joked that maybe she already was pregnant. (No judgment, just a little joking around.)
I went right back to the ledge.