Friday, September 24, 2010


It's practically a full-time job getting used to the idea of having a baby boy growing inside of me. Too bad I already have a full-time job that peskily demands much of my time, to the tune of 40-hours per week.

Yesterday, I was standing in line to order lunch and ran into a friend who has 4 children, 3 of whom are currently teenagers. I asked Robert how it feels to have three teenagers living at home. He rolled his eyes and just laughed at me. I'll only have 2 at a time, so I can imagine that he has little sympathy for me, considering the Meatball is only a 21-week-old fetus. As I visualize my future, 16 years down the road, I am clear about one thing: We will be having hygeine discussions early and often, and I plan arrange it so Sadie and Meatball each have their own bathroom. Privacy is really the only thing I am clear about teenagers needing and wanting. When I was a teenager I shared a bathroom with my dad and my brother (who was 14 months my senior), and well, we all know how much therapy I have needed. If we divide the bathrooms, I think we gotta go along gender lines during those tumultuous teenaged years.

But, I am getting way ahead of myself.

I also haven't checked in because I went temporarily INSANE looking for the perfect baby boy bedding. I had to call a friend to intervene as the HOURS ticked away during which my job was expecting work product and briefs and motions. I was so gripped by my search that I was sweating and starting to hallucinate. Then, someone at work gave me what I can only consider chocolate crack in the form of a new website I had never heard of:

Good lord, the linens and price on that site. I will say that the bedding is gorgeous, lush, creative, and totally dazzling. I will also report that my very favorite bedding, a circus motif, cost approximately $744.00. One of my friends asked me if it came with a crib. I said, "crib? does it come with a baby?" That's a lot of money for a dust ruffle, a sheet and a bumper. The only small snag in my plan is that Jeff said I could have whatever bedding I wanted as long as we didn't buy a bumper. The newest thinking on SIDS prevention is that bumpers are NO NO. We have one for Sadie that has been smushed in the corner of her closet since she started sleeping in the crib. At 2 months old. I know I have to let this go. I should probably block that website from my computer. This is a website for the Queen or for Jennifer Lopez or Elizabeth Taylor and her offspring. We could get the sock monkey motif bedding for only $462.00, but I still think that's going to be hard to justify to my bookkeeper, I mean, husband.
My point is that it takes hours to crawl through the different websites convincing myself that this or that bedding is a critical piece of the whole mosaic of family life that will produce a loving, well-adjusted, self-actualized boy, who will become a fullfilled man, capable of emotional, professional and spiritual accomplishments. But, not if I pick the wrong bedding. It will all crumble and my kids will head straight to destitution and heartache and world weariness.
Being this neurotic takes time; lots and lots of time.
I told Jeff the other night that he was officially in charge of decorating the nursery. I can't do it and stay employed and off of psychotropic mediations. I can't wait to see what he comes up with.

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