Thursday, May 5, 2011

Help Wanted

I know a great law firm looking for a mid- to senior-level associate to do some cutting edge legal work.

Yes, I am now about 48 hours into life WNJ ("with no job") and I have to say, I am embracing it quite wholeheartedly. I was very emotional on Tuesday after the official "voluntary resignation" as my firm is calling it. On Wednesday, the whole subject stung a little less. By this morning, I decided my best days were ahead of me, starting with today. The sun was shining (for a few hours, at least), I took a walk with Simon, Jeff was home safely from DC and gave me a sleep shift longer than I have had since Simon was born, and I was ready to be reborn into this new full-time mom gig. Now, the only thing left to sort out is the COBRA paperwork and returning my iPhone, which is a slightly sore subject because my firm didn't issue me the iPhone, it just let me put my firm email on it. Somehow and somewhere I signed a form saying that at the end of my tenure, I would return the iPhone.


In other news, my next big project is to find my fashion identity as a mom. Sorry, but the Dansko clogs hurt my feet and I am not ready to run around in tennis shoes all the time. It is hard to come up with an impetus to "get dressed" everyday when I know that Simon will spew my own precious breast milk at me and Sadie will probably eat yogurt with her hands and then give me a big hug. I knew how to dress as a lawyer: the pencil skirt, the cardigan, the cute shoes. Where the hell am I wearing Charles and David spectator pumps now? The Mapplewood Park where thugs-in-training swarm the swings? What about all those cute skirts? I don't think I can do tummy time in a J. Crew floral skirt and come out with my joints in the right place. But, does this mean it's all yoga pants and flip flops for me? I guess the point is that I COULD pretty much wear whatever I want and I see moms wearing velour sweatsuits and Nike sandals that look like they stepped out of the Chanel lounge wear collection. The question is: WHO AM I? And, yes, I take fashion choices seriously enough to mean this almost seriously. That's the big question, globally and sartorially. No longer climbing ladder leading to partnership while wearing Ann Taylor separates, I am sort of adrift. That's a good thing. And, it's going to take a while to feel comfortable at this pace and at this place. I don't really see me wearing Lulu Lemon pants and Earth Mother shoes all around, but then again, I never saw myself letting go of law firm life.

When I am not contemplating the big questions, like what shoes does this mother wear, I am wondering where in the hell the pictures of Penelope Cruz's child are? Excuse me, Penelope, but you get to have sex with Javier Bardem and procreate with him, so the least you could do is share pictures of your offspring. Quit being so selfish.

Glad I got that off my chest.

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